PSYCH!

So, as most should know, Etsy is the greatest place in the universe (or at least the internet). Vintage galore. But, anyway, that's not why I'm posting. Tomorrow, if I remember (HA! Good luck) I'll post an entire recap about Thrift Store Raid Night! But I probably won't remember, so don't hold your breath.
Vintage is the greates thing on the planet. I say 'planet' because stars are awesome-er. They just are. Sorry, vintage. Nevertheless, vintage still holds a special place in my heart. Right next to the blood.
There's been a slight delay in our awards show. We're still deliberating on certain nominees, categories, etc. But, rest assured, when we decide, it will be AWESOME.
And here's why:
1) Gaspard Ulliel is involved which will automatically make this little thing a whole lot better.
2) The awesome-est people in the world AKA your dictators are hosting it :D Just smile and nod, now.
3) It will have every category. From Best Ninja Drawing to Longest Email to Best Decade (fashion-wise, of course). And many, many more.
Stay tuned and we hope to post that darned thing soon. But, soon, for me, means about 3 months for the rest of you mortals and/or sane individuals.
Ta ta for now, and hopefully, next time, it'll be in all-out Awards Show Garb.

Did You Miss Me?!

That's right children! The magnifecent Haley_is_British is bacccckkkk.

Anywho hello there! So much has been going on, I can't even begin to tell you. So I won't.

Insteaddd I will talk about something totally random but wonderful.

The next post I do will be uber spectacular. It's called the Awards of Awesomeness as Agreed Upon by Haley_is_British and Rachael_Writes_On, Though The Awards Themselves Are Not That Awesome As They Do Not Exist, And The People That Get Them Are Probably Only Awesome to Haley and Rachael Because That's Just How They Roll Awards. Or, for short, the A.O.A.A.A.U.B.H.I.B.A.R.W.O.T.T.A.T.A.N.T.A.A.T.D.N.E.A.T.P.T.G.T.
A.P.O.A.T.H.A.R.B.T.J.H.T.R.A.

Okay, the title isn't actually that short... but still! It shallt be epic.
Soooo the next blog post you read (or don't read, whatever) shall be amazing. So wear your fancy dresses and high heels, and be prepared for the Fashion Police on our Virtual Red Carpet. Because they're allllways watching. ALWAYS. LIKE NOW!

Bet you regret wearing those fuzzy slippers, eh?

Anywho, I have to go pick out a rainbow feather number for the awards show.

Love, (even those of you that will get called out by the Fashion Police... well, most of you.)
Haley_is_British

It's An All-Out Pow-Wow!

I'll get to the important stuff first but! In MOST important (but also irrelavant) news, I have a question: If a female psychic fell overboard on a cruise ship and floats, does that make her clairBOUyant?
Just asking. I had something else to say but now, I really can't remember.

**EDIT**

I remember now! Something about pizza! And bands. And pow-wow-ness.
THAT'S RIGHT!
ANOTHER BAND IS COMING TO OUR SCHOOL!!!
That's all I have to say. For now.
Oooooooh SPARKLY! *sparkle sparkle*

Just About The Funniest Thing I've Ever Seen.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pPIHvPhvkA&feature=related

Oh, man. Monkeys. They're just so darn funny.

Haley. Haley Haley Haley. Haley is odd apparently.

Haley looks like...

- she's about to claw my eyes out.

BAHAHAHAHA. Depends on who you are.

-looks like a miniature version of Greg, if he'd been a girl.

... Who the heck is Greg?


Haley likes....

-the same places fungus likes.

THAT'S SO MEAN!

- to play

Yes. Yes I do. What now sucker?


Haley says...

-he was surrounded by a crowd of excited men.

Ahh. This is the guy whose eyes I must claw out, correct?

-L.Johnson has a "clean slate" with the Chiefs.

Say what now?


Haley wants...

-Matt and Boldin.

...?

-to wish us all a "Merry Christmas!"

Happy Holidays, apparently.


Haley hates...

-Anorexic people.

Hahaha they're bony, I can take them!

-me.

Who is me? The dude whose eyes I scratched out? Buddy, don't take it personally.

Haley can...

- run the rats out of Valley Ranch.

.... questionable. I do not enjoy chasing rodents of any sorts.

- sing.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh Google, you're so silly!

Haley is...

- just posing for pictures like the ladies in the furry old pictures.

................... so confused.

- my hero.

Yay! Whoever you are...

Haley loves...

- Luke.

Luke who?! Luke who?! WHO IS LUKE?! IS HE BRITISH?!

- Danny.

...I get around.

Haley reads...

-selected Polish poetry.

Uh huh. Cuz that's how I roll. Polish style.

- Can You Moo?

Yes I can. Moooooooo.

COOLLLLLDDDDDPPPPLLLLAAAAAYYYYY!!!

It's official now!! Haley, Kimmey and I are going to a COLDPLAY CONCERT!!!!!!!!

This is exhilarating!! Ahh, now that that's taken care of.

I Just HAD to Try This...

Okay, so I got this thing from another blog and I want to try it so here goes nothing. And I do mean nothing.

Rachael looks like...
-she was born with that hat on and a cigar in her hand
That is messed up.
-what a real woman should look like
Is that a compliment?

Rachael likes...
-him alot
Him? Who's him?? I need a him!
-to take pictures
I guess...I'm completely unphotogenic so I guess I'd rather be behind the lense.

Rachael is...
-having a baby
No I'm not. They tested for that at the ER :P
-now a full time teacher
I'm not patient enough to be a teacher...

Rachael wants...
-to go home
I am home.
-a nap
True. It's 11:18pm.

Rachael says...
-yes to edible lip balm!
No Comment.
-she wants "her" coffee

Rachael does...
-it big
Woooooow.
-donuts
Donuts ARE delicious.

Rachael can...
-fix your leaky tap.
Hey, I'm no plumber.
-plan a future
That's for darn sure

Rachael loves...
-the orphans
Go orphans. Woot woot.
-her new phone
It's not really new but I do love it!

Rachael reads...
-to Tom
Who's Tom?
-to Ryan
WHO'S RYAN AND WHY DO I READ TO HIM???

Rachael writes...
- a quarterly column for the American Christian Fiction
I find that hilarious.

Rachael cooks...
-mustard steaks.
Thank you, Rachael Ray.

All I've figured out is that someone has a website call rachel.writes.net and that if you type Rachael into Google all you get is about fifty million things about that cooking lady that talks to ingredients. Coocoo coocoo.

Happy March Patrons!!

So today that new show premiered, Running in Heels. I had to watch it just because and might I say that those girls were Bs with Itches. And some MAJOR itches at that.

Anyhoo, I'm all healed from the surgery and I should be back to doing P.E. in no time :P But until then, I'll continue to sit out.

A recent MURDER by my grandma's house started a domino effect for me and my friend (Not Haley) and I started another story in which she will do the editing and cover design and whatnot. Not fair if you ask me. She gets the fun parts.

And that's all the news for today.

Until next time, readers, GOODBYE!!

Commercials: They Have a Good Side

Okay, so I will explain the title in a moment. But first of all, more important business.

DEV PATEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I am calm. But needless to say, the Academy Awards were awesome in every sense of the word possible. I laughed, I cried, I laughed so hard I started crying. And I got stalked by a creepy jumbo carboard cut out and had to run away in heels. It was muy bueno.

Okay anywho, the commercial thing.
Today "Penguin" from Otis' blog, and my other friend Kimmey (yes the one that loves cardigans and got married to Whosie-whatsie-dude-face.) made some pretty sick commercials today. Actually we hardly did, we just goofed off. But does that make it any less awesome? I thinkith notith.

Oh and Otis, the theories will live on.

Love, (you too Dev. Gosh you look good in a tux.)
-Haley_is_British

I'm ALIIIIIIVE!!

Well, I don't think any of you read Otis/Megs/Kirit's blog but they've been talking about me basically non-stop. Yes, I got my appendix out. Yes, I'm fine. No, It doesn't hurt.
Bottom Line: Hospital's SUCK.
Anyhoo, Mandy, good luck with your surgery, when they wake you up every two hours to take your blood pressure, don't say I didn't warn you.
"Oh, dear, your blood pressure is 86 over 60! That's low!!"
"No duh, I've been sleeping. It's 2am."
But in other news, I have no other news!! Ahhh I crack myself up...

Oh, btw, Mandy, I know what you're playing in band next!! I had to copy it today and then mail it to Camarado. =)

I really want a brownie right now....

NAME CHANGE!!! and other less important stuff.

I changed the name and the URL. I'll keep the old URL up with a link to the new one but I got annoyed at the old name. Obviously, if you found this then.....you know. But anyway.

Okay so I've just decided: FRENCH POP IS COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY AWESOME. That is all. Uh....Scroll down to see Kimmey lost in the snow and that's about it. Ta ta for now!!

Oh NOOOOO!!!!!

OH NO!!! TERRIBLE NEWS!!!!
KIMMEY IS STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE WITH NO POWER! SHE'S SNOWED IN?!!?
WHATEVER WILL WE DO?!

Poor Kimmey. I can picture her now.
Curled up in the fetal position, no books, no puppy.
Hopefully she has enough cardigans to keep her warm.

Good luck Kimmey. We'll miss you.

Love (especially the new music I bought on iTunes.)
Haley_is_British

REJECTION!!! It buuuuurns. Not really.

Well, I was expecting that but it still came as a sort of shock. I guess I had been hoping even when I had told myself not to. I don't listen to myself very well. Anyway, I opened my email and saw that tell-tale email. Saaad. Well I decided that instead of getting all technical-y and trying to get an agent, I'll just go straight to publisher--when I'm good and ready. (That way, I won't blow it again) I figure I'll practice on some random agents. hahaha. And if I get accepted well, badabing!! Killing 2 birds with 1 stone here.

Now, for the more important part of this post. HALEY!!!!! That agent you told me to submit to? Ha, WRONG PERSON!! Maureen Johnson and Meg Cabot's agent is Lexa Hillyer. Niiice, Nelson. Oh, and, btw, she now works for Razorbill and she's looking for "...chick lit, realistic fiction for girls and some paranormal stories, but is always looking for the next great thing with a fresh story, fun hook and impressive prose." So, What. Now.
*grumble grumble* must print story for ex credit now. And kill the virus on my computer. Poor thing, didn't have a chance. DIE! It's the curse of the trojan. Its a virus AND our school mascot.

How. Could. I. Be. So. Absolutley. Completley. RETARDED????

I. Forgot. A. Query. Letter.
*hits self on forehead*
Don't worry though, readers, I shall resend, claiming my mistake (thx megan) and then apologize. And send into like 50 other agents.
But there's actually one publisher that might actually look at my unsolicited manuscript. And that publisher is? Well, you may have heard of Razorbill. They publish half of my favorite books.
1) Audrey, Wait
2) 13 Reasons Why
Well, if you email them a query letter, an outline/synopsis and 3 sample chapters, they'll respond in APPROXIMATELY 8 WEEKS. That's really not that bad. Some other publishers take like 15 weeks. How long does it take to scan through a manuscript? I mean, really, 15 weeks? It takes me about 2 days to read a book and I read slow. Ask anyone.

Anxiety. Problems. AH!

Having sent into a place where they do awesomeness aka a literary agent's office, I'm completely freaking out. Calm. Calm. Calm.

Who am I kidding? I CAN'T BE CALM AT A TIME LIKE THIS...or ever.
But still, I am waiting for a reply and if I get one, I'm screwed.
Oh My Goth, I'm not done yet. Fret fret. Panic panic.

On top of that, I've got an alienated best friend, a geometry final and a creep after me again! HOW DO I HAVE TIME FOR ALL OF THIS??

Well, not to ramble again but...OH MY GOTH!!! Why did I do this to myself?

Haley, I blame you.

This is One of My Favorite Thinnnnngs.

Song Quote!
Anywho, I love the following video for many reasons.

One- It has Elmo in it. And anyone that does not love Elmo has problems. And I WILL find them.
Two- It has John Mayer in it. JOHN MAYER!!!!!!! MY HUSBAND.... or atleast one of them.
Three- IT HAS ELMO ANNNND JOHN MAYER IN IT. TOGETHER!!!!! Four- It's cute as heck. *sigh* Life is good.

So here it is. The video of all videos. Or... the ones lacking British Guys.
http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20256048,00.html

Love (John Mayer and Elmo included.)
Haley_is_British

Writers Bleed Ink

You know, sometimes I wonder (when I'm staring blankly into space), "Why is that object getting bigger even though I'm not moving?"
And then it hits me. Quite literally.
Anyhoo, I've also got this theory, I've been thinking that if you're a writer of some sort or whatever then the writing gene must flow through your veins. Then I got thinking, if writing is in your blood does that mean we bleed ink? Those of us that write, anyway.
But really!! I feel like checking but I'm not in any way emo so I'll just wait till some freak pushes me down in P.E. again. Then I'll know...

I have three new favorite songs that everyone should listen to. Just because.
1) Everything I Ask For by Maine
2) Cross My Heart by Marianas Trench
3) Just Another One by Rocket to the Moon

Believe me, they're all awesome. Anyway, let's all go out and use lemons and limes to fight some of the evil doings in our world, this time in the form of some creepy dude approaching a 13 year old in our neighborhood. C'mon, people, this isn't that hard.
KIDS + KIDS = LOVE THAT WON'T LAST
ADULTS + ADULTS = LOVE THAT WILL PROBABLY END UP IN DIVORCE (as much as no one wants to admit it, it's so true these days)
KIDS + ADULTS = FREAKING FREAKY

Just say no, people, really.

Acronyms Make the World Go Round

You know, people seem to underestimate the power of acronyms. I will now ramble on about what I mean. Haters be warned.
Let us reminisce...

Ahh, there I was. Sitting next to that rather tall fellow in my American Studies class. And there Rachael is, looking rather bored, like always. Must... listen... to... teacher. So I turned my attention forward and there was my rather humorous teacher. But that day we weren't learning about gory battles (yet) but political cartoons.
The one displayed on our cancerous Promethean board was an image of two people talking to turkeys, and of course, PETA is brought up.
"Doth thee knoweth what thy acronym means?" said my perky teacher. He doesn't actually speak like that... but how AWESOME would that be? A girl can dream, so for now, that is what he said.
Anywho, someone answered. But NO! It wasn't one of those annoying know-it-all kids. It was something totally unexpected, yet wonderful all at the same time. The answer shall amaze you.
"PEOPLE EATING TASTY ANIMALS!" the kid said.

HOW INGENIOUS IS THAT?! Maahvelously, I'd say.
So, this got me thinking. Me and Rachael already have KMBO, but what about other acronyms, eh? My list of popular acronyms, and what they could mean:

ANTM- America's Next Top Model.
OR..... Annoying Nasty Tall Men.
PATD- Panic At The Disco.
OR...... People Armed With Dance.
PSP- Playstation Portable.
OR.... Penguins Staging Props.
PTA- Parent Teacher Association.
OR.... Party Time America!
GBA- GameBoy Advance.
OR.... Grandmas Blinging Armadillos.
BTW- By The Way...
OR..... Brightening Tacky Worlds.
TMI- Too Much Information.
OR.... Tracking Multiple Iguanas.
JSYK- Just So You Know.
OR...... Jumping Stupid Young Kids.
ATM- Automatic Teller Machine.
OR..... Allowing Teacher's Mind-Control.
LOTR- Lord of the Rings.
OR..... Lazy Ogres Teaching Rap.
LARP- Live Action Role Playing. (You know, those kids that dress up in capes and pointy hats and whack their best friend with a wooden stick, pretending that their best friend is a dragon, and the stick is a sword.)
OR..... Lovely and Rare Pinatas.
BFF- Best Friends Forever.
OR... Blasted Flipping Friendship!!
AKA- Also Known As.
OR.... Acronym Knowledge Association.

Ahemm... "WHOOP! There it is!"
Ahemm. So, if anyone sees a spare acronym lying around, all lonely and sad. Probably eating lunch alone, and in desperate need of a hug, let me know. I'll find a meaning for it. There WILL be a second AMTWGR.

Love (unless you just so happen to be the person who invented science fairs, or the first person to wear shoulder pads back in the 80's. DARN YOU!)
Haley_is_British

A Follow-up to Life Plans

British, Kimmey and I all left California and went to Reno to elope. We have pictural evidence.

First off, was me and Matt Thiessen. Sorry nonexistant Matt Thiessen fans, we're now married. I know it's kind of a downer but you'll all have to get over it. I actually feel kind of sorry for Matt because he didn't have any other fans to choose from. Poor Matt. Oh well, more for me!


Next was Haley. She married her two of her imaginary invisible boyfriends, Rafael, the Italian, and Pete-ah, the Brit. Haley loves her Brits. Note from Haley: Take THAT Jen and whoever it was that married Channing Tatum!!!







And last was Kimmey. She got married in the front seat of her car. The minister was on a lunch break. She married her imaginary invisible boyfriend: Jackson-Milo Rathbone-Brody-Petey. Kimmey decided to keep her name. So now, she's Mrs. Kimmey Jackson-Milo Rathbone-Brody-Petey. Kimmey now has carpal-tunnel from signing her name on all the papers so many times. Poor Kimmey.

Okay, so none of this happened. Or maybe it did. It's a fifty-fifty chance. Remember, being locked in a very small room for consecutive hours with paint fumes = BAD!

What Paint Fumes Do To You: A Firsthand Experience

Where to start, where to start. We should recap. FLASHBACK!

Well as we walked through the paint store, it was a magical experience when we landed upon the perfect color. Merlin. Pun somewhat intended. After deciding on multiple accent colors, British and I went back to my house and began the grueling task of purple-white-purple-white! "You got white in my purple!" "Well you got purple in my white!" Finally, done and completely loopy--those fumes get to you after a while.

So now, at 12:23am, writing this, we must say au revoire, bloggowers!

Love (unless you're the idiot that decided to make paint smell bad),
-Haley_is_British and Rachael_Writes_On